Published on January 20, 2021

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‘Mom, Dad, I want to be a writer.’

• Post author By tbrg
• Post date January 20, 2021
• No Comments on ‘Mom, Dad, I want to be a writer.’

Yes. You must become a writer, a world-class author, pen a masterpiece, sip coffees in Paris, win prizes and prize money, maybe the Nobel prize for literature, and be spoken about in the same sentence as Shakespeare. Yes.

OR

You could just write.

Just that. Simply sit down and write whatever comes to your head. Anything and everything. Put it down. And there you go, you’re a writer. Of course, then you go about becoming better at it. The trick is that every time you write, you become slightly better.

The problem comes from having the expectation that the very first thing you write, should be extraordinary. That you must write amazing stuff as soon as the pen touches the paper, or the finger hits the keyboard. But there is absolutely no reason why that should happen. Can you become a CEO of a multinational company on your first day?

So start small, start now. Writing is about expressing the person you are right now. If you come up with a story, it’s going to be from the person you are at the moment. Don’t look at it as a goal-based thing, we anyhow have enough of that in school. You will change, your writing will change, and your stories will change. So you might as well enjoy what you write in this moment.

Maybe you just want to start writing your thoughts every day, maybe you want to start an anonymous blog, maybe you want to write a four-line poem. There are no rules to what you can do. Find inspiration anywhere and everywhere, and write it down. It could be about how your cornflakes might feel, floating in your bowl of milk at breakfast, waiting to be eaten. Write about the walk you took from your class to your school gate at the end of the day. Take the most random part of your day, and put your own twist to it.

Now when people think about writing professionally, we often get this warm feeling that ‘Hey maybe I could be a writer’. But then reality slaps us in the face and self-doubt makes us go back into the safety of our shells. It also doesn’t help that successful writers are spoken about as if they are God-like, almost unreachable. And on the flip side, the unsuccessful ones are thrown in our faces as an example of why we won’t make it either.

Well first, let’s ignore people who say that writing isn’t a profession. Here are some:

• Copywriter in Advertising

• Journalist

• Professional Blogger

• Digital content writer

• Scriptwriter

• Technical writer

• Magazine writer

• Novelist

• Poet

You could pursue a proper education and get a high paying job doing all of the above. Sure it’s not going to pay as much as an Investment Bank, but it all depends on how interested you are in writing. There are courses in great universities which can help you develop those skills, opening your world to further possibilities.

High school is a great time to start writing. There is less pressure, you learn faster and you can take time to develop your skills. We sometimes get bored even thinking about writing, because it reminds us of English class. But we forget that language can be an art form.

So what more else could you do?

• You could attend fun workshops. This isn’t like class, nobody is going to talk about grammar. It’s to discuss ideas and convert them into words.

• Do an internship. Find someone who is a writer, or find someone who works in a writing profession. Beg them to let you intern with them.

• Enter writing contests. Send in something you wrote. What is the worst thing that can happen?

• Learn to re-write. We often just write but never look at it again. So maybe create a habit of editing or re-writing your work. But always finish it.

• Find happiness in imperfection. Your work will never be perfect, enjoy those flaws.

The main thing you can do is to write more. The more you write, and the more you read, the better you become. You’ll make mistakes and you’ll learn from them. Don’t worry about it. Maybe you don’t want to become a professional writer, maybe you just want to write for yourself. That is great and can be an amazing way to let go of any anxiety you feel. Just enjoy the process of expressing yourself now. Later will come whenever it does. What do you want to express right now?

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Are You an Introvert Or Are You Just Shy?

• Post author By tbrg
• Post date January 20, 2021
• No Comments on Are You an Introvert Or Are You Just Shy?

This pandemic has forced us to stay indoors and avoid people. So now are we all automatically introverts? Does this classification of behaviour even hold true? Will we be introverts or extroverts after the pandemic is done? Will we shake hands with strangers at a meeting? Will face to face meetings even happen? Will Zoom dictate all our social interaction? Will college classrooms be with lesser people?

Well no one really knows. But one thing is for sure, this hard classification of being either an introvert or an extrovert is going extinct.

For the longest time, it’s been easy to categorise a quiet person as an introvert and a talkative person as an extrovert. Parents and teachers play their part by reinforcing these stereotypes, because it was done to them as well. The truth is that most of us are Ambiverts, which means that we have some features of extroverts and some of introverts. And almost everyone would agree to that. Carl Jung, who came up with these terms, himself said that nobody can be a 100% extrovert or 100% introvert.

So wait, what is an introvert or extrovert? Simply put, an introvert is someone who gets their energy from being alone and an extrovert is someone who gets their energy from being around other people. Now this is also related to how our individual brains are wired, so there is nothing wrong with being either. You can’t control this aspect.

But a lot of it also has to do with social engineering, which we can control. Most often people who think they’re introverts are actually shy and scared. You’re afraid of being embarrassed or failing, so it’s easy to retreat into books and spend time alone. True introverts choose this alone-time, because they need that time to think. Bill Gates is an introvert, but he deals with millions of people across the world. Elon Musk is an introvert. Meryl Streep is an introvert, but she gets up in front of the camera for a living.

So think about it, are you an introvert or are you just shy?

Introverts tend to be bold, aggressive and intelligent. They just need to go to a lakeside cabin to recharge, and not a party. Many famous people are introverts, but they still work with groups of random people. Sure it can be awkward, but they still get the work done.

When you’re in high school, you might see this image of being an introvert as an identity to have, so you take it. Then people double down and tell you not to be quiet and aloof. So you go even deeper into this hole of being an ‘introvert’. An image often develops that the loud ‘extrovert’ behaviour is rewarded, so you might even form a negative association with being an ‘introvert’.

Now nobody is telling you to be someone you’re not. But unless you explore, there is no way to know who you really are. Rejecting something without trying it, or for the wrong reasons, is not the way forward. Especially after this pandemic.

When you’re in college, you’re going to have projects and study groups with other students. Are you going to wear the badge of being an introvert and reject them? Or will you make an effort to connect with them, and create bonds with people apart from your friends and family. When you join an office, are you going to reject your colleagues? Just because you believe that you’re an introvert? An actual introvert would engage with all of them, but recharge their battery alone at home. Don’t run away from confrontation and collaboration. Don’t let your fear of judgement masquerade as being an ‘introvert’.

Again, this doesn’t mean that you need to hit the next party you’re invited to. It just means that maybe you need to find hacks to be more adaptable. Maybe learn to be more honest with yourself and even others. Maybe you need to learn how to converse with strangers. Often, in large groups, we try to speak to everyone or no one. Next time just try one or two people, but truly engage with them. See what might come out from that. See if you learn something new about yourself. Maybe you’ll reject these tags of ‘introvert’ and ‘extrovert’. And maybe you’ll realise that enjoying solitude is a strength, not a weakness.

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Listen, Don’t Just Hear

• Post author By tbrg
• Post date January 20, 2021
• No Comments on Listen, Don’t Just Hear

‘Be quiet and listen.’

I think we’ve all heard this throughout our lives, and sometimes still do. It can seem like a reprimand, or a dull repetitive sound, based on how many times you’ve heard it and who’s saying it. Most often it’s teachers or parents.

But they aren’t the same thing.

Being quiet and listening are two entirely different actions. This is a myth which has been drilled into our head. And I’m sure the more you think about it, the more you realise how false it is. How many times have you sat quietly in class, but zoned out from your teacher.

And that is the biggest drawback of our high schools. We are never taught how to listen. We have to be quiet during assembly or class, but apart from that we are taught to be ‘Good Orators’. Listening doesn’t really figure in our school’s priorities. You can’t really quantify a good listener, you can’t give a certificate or an award, and you can’t have a high school student stand up on stage and just ‘listen’.

So we need to learn this skill on our own. Why? Because that’s the only way to learn. To actually learn. Not exam syllabus learn, but practical learning which you can actually use in your life. We might think that we’re great listeners, but nobody is going to tell you if you’re not. Only you can figure out if you’re giving the other person enough time to talk.

And it’s important to do that. People are attracted to good listeners because they feel like they’ve been truly heard. People often go deeper and share things that they haven’t before. That forms deeper bonds. Now just imagine the same thing in a work environment, or in a college environment. That’s how you build lasting relations.

We’re often afraid of letting that silence hang in a conversation, so we quickly rush to fill it. We also get that sense of FOMO that we’ve spoken to this one person enough, we need to move on to something else or someone else. We are that restless generation, and this is a good way to just slow down.

Consider this, can you be a musician if you don’t listen? Listen to other musicians? Or to what you play yourself? It’s the same thing. Listening is engaging with another person, and giving them your focus, allowing them to speak. If you want them to listen to you when you talk, why wouldn’t you do the same? Even if you disagree with someone if you let them talk you allow them the space to breathe, making them more receptive to your thoughts. Otherwise, it’s just two people talking over each other and nobody listening.

So why bother about this while you’re still in high school? Because good listeners make great future leaders. Think about it. If you go to a leadership workshop, would you listen or talk? If you wanted to start a business and went to an entrepreneurship workshop, would you listen or talk? A leader is someone who takes the time to listen to people, understands the problem, and then comes up with a solution. What kind of leader comes up with solutions before he even hears the problem? That is a recipe for disaster and bankruptcy.

Now how do you become a better listener?

• Give them your attention. Make eye contact, but don’t stare daggers at them.

• Don’t interrupt, let the other person complete their point.

• Ask questions that cut deeper.

• Read their body language. Listen to the non-verbal cues as well.

• Check your own body language. Don’t stand with folded hands or move restlessly.

• Use affirmative responses to let them know you’re with them.

• Don’t give moral arguments that can stop a conversation.

Nobody likes a person who talks too much. But another way of looking at it is that nobody likes a person who doesn’t listen enough. This is something you learn over a period of time, generally by making mistakes. But you’ll get there. Always remember that a good conversation isn’t between two great speakers, it’s between two great listeners.

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Essential for Online School 101

• Post author By tbrg
• Post date January 20, 2021
• No Comments on Essential for Online School 101

An online ‘life’ has become the new norm- be it shopping, studying, entertainment, or anything that could possibly strike your mind, right now, you name it, is being done in an online mode. Therefore, rather than sitting on it, we should embrace it and look into more efficient ways to go about living our lives in this new virtual manner. And the best group to start with undoubtedly would be the youth, the students of today, who consume and use it more than any other age group or profession. Here are six essential points that would help you spend your school life in this pandemic swimmingly.

1. Stable Mental Health!

Imagine dreaming to visit a theme park for the longest time and finally getting there, but with a fractured leg. It would be the same as rushing to accomplish your ultimate goal, but with poor mental health. It would eliminate pleasure and intention, making it worthless in the end. The value of mental health can never be stressed upon enough. Similarly, in this pandemic schooling season, it’s healthy to strive for the best whilst at home, in a completely unusual study environment, but if you don’t strive equally for a healthy mind, you will take the burden of it beyond your schooling years.

2. Separate Workspace

Quarantining anywhere can most definitely drive you insane, regardless of how relaxed and comfortable the environment might be. Therefore, separating the study and recreation areas in your house is highly important. You can find yourself in confusion when you work, sleep and watch tv at the same place. Designating specific areas to these tasks will not only help you gain clarity but also establish a sense of routine similar to a disciplined and supervised school environment.

3. Change Of Clothes

Routine is vital to our mental health, and it’s an important part of this routine to get dressed. The idea of sticking in PJs every day has some negative consequences, and so when we do so we can start to feel lazy and demotivated, which in turn contributes to a lack of productivity and low levels of operation. However, relaxed clothing also has its pros. If our subconscious mind is not disturbed by being aware that our pants are tight or that our shirt is uncomfortable, it creates room for our mind to completely focus on the tasks at hand, thus increasing cognitive efficiency. Therefore we need to learn to adapt and strike that balance between formal and loungewear for ourselves at home.

4. An Offline Hobby

Although all tasks and entertainment being completed online could have their share of fun, it is also important to remind ourselves to take a step back from the virtual world and reunite with the several hobbies and recreation activities that do not require any gadgets-just as we did back in our schools where no personal gadget was allowed. It could be playing your favorite sport or even an indoor game. This way you would achieve a work-life balance, and also harness other skills that might’ve been forgotten in these chaotic times, giving your eyes and mind a much-needed break.

5. Cleaning Our Laptop/PC

In a time when screen-time on our gadgets has almost tripled, it is hard to keep track of how much time we’re spending in being productive and how much we’re wasting in entertainment. Therefore, a quick hack to keep ourselves in check is to uninstall all entertainment apps from our laptops, making it free from spamming WhatsApp messages from friends while we’re trying to focus on our school assignments and blocking sites like Netflix and others to only access it on your tv or other gadgets during your break. This will allow you to remain focused and increase productivity.

6. Attitude Towards School Online

It can undoubtedly be said that the transition from an offline and regulated environment to an online and unsupervised one has created an overall shift in our attitude towards school, assignments, and examinations. The seriousness and sincerity with which students tackled school before the pandemic is not the same now. We must keep this point in mind at all times and also the fact that even if our mood is not the same, the grading and academic system with which the schools and colleges function will remain the same. Hence, to perform equally well online, we’d have to have the same attitude as before, or else it would add to the long list of problems we have accumulated during this pandemic.